Wednesday, December 31, 2008

31th Dec

一个月发生很多很多的事.....与其写下来.....不如忘了更干脆......
不知道什么时候....我开始以我自己的健忘...变成了一种幸福...

记得那么多,好么?
把以前的事情拘谨着将来,正确么?
以前的悲伤都统统都在生活上带着,不幸苦么?

虽然说我健忘的很厉害,但是算是选择形失忆的类型把... 重要的.....我都不会忘记....普通的....留一张照片来预防万一....不重要的...早就不知道砸去哪个山脚丫子....忘的七荤八素的

明天就是新的一年了.....实在很多感想想给大家....
我就写出来,给大家看看吧....

Su Shyan: 傻婆你啊,下次麻烦不要找些男朋友的年纪,都差不多可以当我爹了==,你娘不高兴才有鬼呢~还有你读书给我勤劳点啊~我电脑中virus就是你的啦~现在我工作了,下次跟你出来我请你看戏哦(补回上次的 >.<
Su Woan 大姐: 努力读书啊~毕业典礼叫我哦~ 我要当Sabulang哦~ 抱歉你的生日+圣诞礼物我还没空送去.... T_T,顺便祝你跟福霖长长久久丫~
Lihua : 你这骚猴子,有了另一半就给我生生性性,年终换mate还厉害过我换衣服==,下次给我取klang我肯定抓你来咬 xD.你的生日礼物搁在我这里很久了....不知道啥时候才能给你 =_=lll
小龙 : 你啊, 祝你幸福快乐就好了拉~ XD 呵呵呵~
Andrew: 要当乖孩子哦....你未成年,不好那么快就做18sx的事情啊..... ==老哥我会发飚阿...
Chilly Mummy: Mummy 阿...你算是我遇到那么多女孩子最特别的一个,跟你闹在一起没有压力,超舒服的,虽然说你每次都武装自己,什么冷血残酷无情,呵呵....但是我却认为你比那些贪欲虚荣的女人好得多了. 加油哦..... :) 儿子都在这里支持你的
Ah Ben :恭喜找到男朋友咯,好好对Igor 哦 :D
Jimmy Zai: 新的一年,给自己新的开始把,不好又亲手把自己的姻缘给毁掉了哦.... :D
笨嘟嘟 : 哈哈....................我要说都对你说完了,所以我不写啦 xD (偷懒:X)


希望大家像我,把不开心的忘记掉,把开心的记牢,迎接新的一年吧~~ 另外感谢来我部落坐坐的朋友们。谢谢你们哦


鸣谢
以及还有其他路过替我留言的
谢谢你们哦

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

3rd Dec

夜来寒雨月苍茫,
人去阁楼空苍凉,
自身茹静沉书香,
痴对垂柳暗心酸,
一层土楼不堪风,
何能锁得哭人疯,
荆棘铁藜筑成行,
何苦伤人伤自身,
细细梦中寻旧事,
方知自难为君子,
梦醒 空虚
冷笑从前不堪事
苦了人儿 苦了自儿
万千垂柳
不如
一个哀愁

无才书生
何来佩骄柔?

Sunday, November 30, 2008

30th Nov

路茫
提灯慢路行
小道 疙瘩
赤脚蹑足 寂静黯然

贫者
痛 累 辛 酸
塞进背囊
不说 不闹 不声 不响
默默拖着
暗夜痕迹

临界 极限
人倒 囊倾

静静在路旁
静静在打算

走 继续付出

留 继续颓废

弃 继续流浪

茫茫夜路
何时到南方

Saturday, November 29, 2008

29th Nov

和他一个星期了......快乐....开心...也伴随着.....一些不安...

昨天他来我家,我们一起真的很幸福....顽皮的玩闹,一起看anime...一起听歌....
我实在很高兴....他能够很融洽得跟我的母亲聊天,跟我爸爸说话...哈哈...
短短的几个小时,已经能让我很满足了,因为我想见到他.....看他笑得样子....

今天....难得我的朋友,也就是chilly mummy还有他的banana来KL玩, 他在工作....也不好打扰他...在家里....无所事事,就尽一尽地主之谊,招待,陪伴着两位远道而来的朋友吧....我不想跟他说,我的朋友就是他们,我知道撒谎是不对的,但是我真的不要他乱想...我真的只是找他们聊聊天,逛逛街,交个朋友吧了....我很内疚....

路途中,收到他的message...他很累,肚子痛.....我很担心他...她怎么了....是不是又来病了?怎么办..... 一个头两个大.....我又不能去他家找他... 我朋友在又不方便找他....真的很担心.... mummy还有banana都跑到了老远,我还在想着他.... 他突然sms说... "我对自己没有信心,我觉得自己很没用"..... 我很想哭....你到底在做什么啊?难道...我喜欢你,是因为你有用??你当我什么?你又没有当我是你男朋友啊?.....这句话...他接近每天都说同样的话....我考着STPM已经很大压力了....心里依然默默承受....不要伤心,不要和你说,我宁愿我一个人扛.....毕竟自己的感受,没有必要弄到你不开心....我真的希望你开心就好了.....

回到家,我已经累垮了.....驾车驾了好久,也陪了我aiya mummy很多了...回到家,依然是那句话,出现在sms...... " i worry zuzu grabbed by others..."

很想....很想....大大声喊....
我是手提袋么?我是手机么? 人家抢我就那么容易么?
顿时觉得, 你不是对你没信心,是对我没信心吧?
我是个人,我不是水性杨花还是ameoba,说变就变的..... 我知道,我们刚一起我不能给你信心,然而,你要我做的,我都做了...

你不要我上论坛....好.....我放弃了接近20个很好聊天的朋友.....完全断绝联系....

你不要我跟人家搞暧昧.....好....sms/msn/friendster的不知名人士,完全不理....

你要我读书...好....我开着wedcam,给你看着我读书,我不要偷懒....够么?

你要知道我的帐号,密码....好.....我统统给你.....我连我完美世界game的也给你....IC number我都给你....连我的blog也给你....

一切,不是你逼我,我自愿的......


依然..... 你需要 信心


我很多疑问....

什么是信心?

我付出的,证明不了我的信心?

我喜欢你,需要你自己的信心?

我们的关系,开始于两个人的信心?

我想念你,是因为你有用?



很混淆....
很累........
我开始迷惘了.....爱是什么.....

谁可以跟我说, 信心,在那里啊? 我需要一个....

我要给他...

能不能啊?

我喜欢他啊

他要信心哦

我就给他啊

我什么都给

什么都给....

救救我......信心在那里?我不要失去他.............


崩溃了........我需要时间恢复........电话暂时的封锁了....也不上网了........哭了..............睡了.........可不可以忘记呢?

Sunday, November 23, 2008

23th November

怎么办.....才没见他一天.....就满脑子都是他的身影...抱不住,抓不到...
抱着小嘟嘟....幻想着他....温暖的...很舒服....

一直以来,我都没有这般付出心的恋爱....不是不适合,我的问题就是对方的问题.
也许我们年龄相仿,也许我们的部分相似...也不知道什么缘故,频频梦到他,在我怀抱着小嘟嘟睡觉的夜里

说真的,我既没有才华,样貌,身材,甚至家庭背景,我也自认没有魅力...可是他,其实本来就可以随便买个礼物敷衍我的,却亲力亲为帮我做了3个娃娃......
我不知道,他到底喜欢我什么,而我,我就喜欢,他对我不曾修饰过的关心,关怀....
认识他,只是一段很短的日子,谈不上什么感情深厚...自从认识了她,每天带电话去学校也开始留意电话的信息,贴身....可惜我很笨,不是电话SILENCE,就是跑来跑去没感觉到振动。很恨自己,为什么每天把电话乱乱丢....听到他说:no need to reply me ... we just friend...
心不自觉,抽痉了一下

这些日子,不是他叫我读书,监督着我,我的chemistry根本就不可能可以每一题都可以做,我知道他是为了我好,他常常说他自己逼我的,可是我是自愿的...我也知道,他是为我好的....
本来,自从看到他在blog写的事,知道他喜欢着一个人....心都凉了半戳.... 在想,应该不是我吧?也不可能是我啊....哈哈....(苦笑)..也许他当我是好朋友罢了。也好,就当他是我的好朋友就算了... 但是...我却很好奇,他到底喜欢谁?我把我心里喜欢的人,也就是他,变成另外一个不存在人物,和他来个交换

"你和我说你喜欢谁,我也和你说我喜欢谁,好么?"
可惜的是,他始终没说....

一切,失望,摸索,期待,幻想,统统不敢在blog露出马脚....我不要当第三者...

生日前一天,我再考虑要不要表白....我不要对他说谎话....他的信息我不敢回,电话都不敢接,wedcam也不要开,不让他看到我颓废的样子.... 他生气了....丢下一个blog的link给我,就下线了...

看了,我真的崩溃了...他那么久以来的HE,竟然就是我.....
一通电话,换来不肯定的答案,也闹了一夜的牢骚....我还真的很小孩子气...

本来,我以为他会拒绝我的....我们在午餐都是很平常的在聊...
他却主动的,抓牢我的手....我高兴得.....都不知道该怎么反应了...他接受了么?还是什么?
看着MAMAMIA,感动得剧情,好听的老歌,我和他,众目睽睽下,亲吻了

一切发生得太突然...

无论如何

我扪心地说

虽然,你什么都有了,而我能给你的不多,可是我不要给你口头的发誓,我也不要给你我做不到的承诺,我只要我们俩一直走下去,一起过日子,虽然不能常相见,虽然我是个路痴,驾车技术很烂,我却很希望能够载你,到外头走走.

虽然我们才刚开始,但是,希望时间真的能,证明

小嘟嘟,好香,好温暖....... 就好像,另外的一个你....

Saturday, November 22, 2008

22nd November

这一年。。。。这一个月。。。。这一天。。。。。
我终于得到,我最渴望的一份礼物。。。
不是物质,不是享受。
而是他

我班上的朋友,只有班长还有副班长知道我生日还来祝贺我之外,其他的人统统没有反应。。。他们每个人的生日,我都有献一份力。。。虽然很痛心。。可是,我却得到我最想要的他。。

一只毛茸茸的可爱小狗狗,嘟嘟, 成了我们的见证人,他搂着我的手,手心很热,却格外温暖。。戏院里,虽然看着笑片,但是却笑在心里,
只因
他终于接受我了....

我不敢在任何他看得到的地方,知道我对他有意思。。。我刚刚跟我的风流男朋友做回朋友,我不想给他坏的印象...就连blog....我也秘密写在日记里,他的一切....

好开心.....
梦里他送了我一个蛋糕.....就好像刚才他替我买的蛋糕一样.... 白色的....甜...香泌入心....

真的很感动....我竟然是他第一个男朋友载他回家.....有点受宠若惊...也许我实在野蛮任性...也许被他管,也是件好事吧?

我不会后悔.... 只因为.... 我曾经认识你,见过你,喜欢过你,曾经和你在一起....已经够了...

我要求不多...只希望你别嫌弃我就可以了....(我常常很累,但是很好玩罢了 >.<)

我喜欢你啊...........我终于说出来了.......................

嘟嘟.....还有巫毒娃娃......是你的心意,也是我最满意的礼物....

Friday, November 14, 2008

14th November

前天下午,闷得实在有点慌了....
整整下午1点才起身(很过分对吧?但是真的很累啊。。。)。。。肚子空空的。。。望了一下我的妹子,瞧她的样子也是没吃东西就在JBtalk逛街...

硬是拖了她,去我家附近的jusco找些吃的还有乐子 xD


其实我很喜欢这间jusco的.....不知道为什么,可能空旷一点,比较简洁吧,总好过Maluri的似乎有点挤, 那些timesquare and sungai wang什么的,我看到都怕了, 最怕人潮拥挤的鬼地方,走多两下都会缺氧然后走路好像梦游~~~~游啊游啊~~~游到哪都不知道了=.=lll

妹妹拿了mummy生日时候jusco送的KFC礼卷,两个人就在慢的人的旁边,吃个撑肚皮, 一点也不顾仪态。我还好啦~男子嘛~~怕啥啊?可是我妹子也是一副和我一样的模样.... =.=lll自行想象...

饱了~~~要干些什么?对了,不如去看电影吧?今天我期待已久的Mandagascar 2上映了!!Yeah!!!爽一下~~ xD

咦?怎么这两个女孩那么熟脸孔........不就是以前我的学校的st john的朋友么?哈哈~~聊了10分钟。。结果还记不起他们的名字....... >.

看了看售票情形....啥? 10.45 pm? 谨此一场?Oh my god........打电话问下家长要不要看...

....
.......
..........
...............
.....................

怎么没有声音啊? 看了看荧幕, on dail O.Olll ,突然间有种不好的预感, 连打电话的嘟嘟声都没了.........登时我的心凉了半截.....

该不会是......又坏了吧? o.Ollll oh my ghost...
还好我叫老爸打给我妹妹(这妹妹也是的,吝啬到她这样的也是频临绝种的生物了....哪里有人家里扑满那么多钱,出街竟然只带RM20,电话还过期2个月的.......服...... m(_ _)m ),我老爸跟我妈说了才肯定要买

买了四张票, 满“重皮”的......... T_T rm40 fly away~~~~~不管未来有多困难~~顶多回家跟老爸claim回咯 =.=ll (很坏ho?)

怎么办,现在才下午2点.... =.=lll ,要干些啥?话说回来,我还是第一次看到shopping centre有 pos office这回事,呵呵~~那么要还水电费还不容易么? giegiegiegie~~~~~~(smile creepy~)

5minute......

10 minute........

15 minute............

20 minute ..........................

有没有搞错啊.....我只要还Streamyx的帐单罢了, 竟然等了那么久....
我们来的时候已经是轮到编号 10172, 我们拿的是10177,这样都有本事等候20分钟才到我们....还是开放2 counter,你说这些malay同胞做东西是不是很geng? =.=a

算了去打鼓吧~~ 呵呵~~ 最喜欢到jusco里面的play ground去玩 太鼓达人,wakekeke~~我妹妹也是很喜欢玩哦~~


想不到.....我一开始玩normal的.....其实还蛮难得....怎么我妹妹过得了关啊 \(O.O)/ 眼瞪得鸭蛋那么大.....我练了好久才能玩normal 的歌..... T_T没有天分也只好苦练了....

嘻嘻~~妹妹累了,我就solo自己来玩~ HARD 的!! 瓦卡卡卡~~~~~~(很癫ho?我妹妹在后面拼命装作不认识我...... o(= =")o )

第一首歌,我熟悉的~要过关? 容易拉~~~哈哈哈~~~ 但是miss掉 很多........................糗毙了..
NEXT~~~竟然给我找到 魔法老师NEGIMA 的片头曲~~哇~~好开心哦~就选他!!

20秒后, 后悔了......................

快到....乱到....完全看不到!!! @.@

妹妹已经在后面偷笑了.......恨........老子一定会练成击鼓神功的!! 你等着瞧!!

谁知道...
后面排队的两个小孩子.......比我厉害 N倍....HARD的歌......差不多300combo .....昏死。。。赶快落跑~~~~~~闪~~~ xD

晚上~我们一家人穿得好像移民去北极的模样,一起出发到戏院~ 好奇怪哦,我们一家人都不小了,竟然还跑来看卡通片...=.=ll 童心未泯还是返老还童?管它的 xD

中间~~~~ skip~~~~~要知道内容请去支持Mandagascar 2 Escape to Affrica xD~~ yeah~~



真的很好看~ 我老爸笑到假牙都差点掉了, 我的笑声也把隔壁的超级重量级的Gor Gor吓倒不敢靠近我了 (厉害咧~~内功深厚噢~~xD)

呵呵~~久久一次全家看电影,还真的很幸福的说~ 发觉到,我似乎越来越疼我妹妹了=.=lll ...

但是,每天在家~~ 还是会喊...........................

蔡XX~~~~番稀
(番薯走音过后的读法.....My FM 阿炳(林德荣) 叫 阿莲(颜美欣) 的口头禅 ) ~~~

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

12th November

堆积如山的习题
砸得我透不过气来
很想把那些
无聊的
刁钻的
甚至
有点变态的
练习题
统统塞去马桶
冲掉
不然我这个
懒惰的
爱睡的
浑噩的
垃圾小孩
真的会被这些厚如城墙的
书本
折磨死掉

虽然说还有一星期就考试了
压力?
有阿~
要不然,
我这笨人哪里会肯读书啊?
Form 5
完全没捧书过
都可以过关
命大吧?

这次可没有那么好彩了..=.=

......哀悼......

最近
过得蛮开心
虽然又单身了
但是
有人愿意陪我
还真的

窝心

可惜,
我这个人很木衲
不会关心人
说话也牛头不对马嘴
不知道,
有没有伤到他了
谢谢哦
你的礼物
满手伤
真的很感动...
你送什么都无所谓
有心
就好

只要你

开心

我也

......会开心......

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

6th November

牙痛不是病,痛起来要人命...
听得多的,倒不觉得是一回事....
但是...

真是混账....怎么刚刚去补牙过两个星期就痛得彻夜难眠, 每天起身还嘴巴痛+肿...
我忍!!

几天过去了,越来越痛...

我再忍....

一个星期过去了.....

不是很痛了...

丢着不管.....

两个月....

痛到受不了.....

才被我娘拖去看牙医........悲哀....被拉着耳朵拽着进去诊所...T_T

医生:(愣了一下) 恩...肯定是发炎了....必须拔掉了.....(然后静静的看着我,等待我的答复)
妈咪:(想了一下)算了,反正看不到,就拔了吧....
我 :(脸青青的,想了很久.................................)......................恩.....................(突然有点后悔....=_=lll)


半个小时过去, 牙龈被麻醉针打得满都是肿包.....脸颊一般都没感觉了, 牙齿拔得好久, 3个牙根还是卡着牙龈不出来.............

!·#%#%·…… 撬得我的头都好像震动机不停的摇==,护士还在帮我押着我的头不要乱动.....结果看到我的牙齿, 我都傻了...


怎么整个牙齿黑色得?o.olll,
医生:都坏死了,当然黑色咯......


回到家....等到麻醉剂慢慢失效的时候,那才可怕...............
痛到真的别牙咧嘴,蜷缩在我的狗窝,逼着自己赶快睡.....

还是睡不着....

还真的多亏了Daniel Lim这个新朋友陪我sms聊天, 不然真的很难挨......

呵呵~~有个帅哥陪我聊天~当然没那么痛了~哈哈~~结果害到人家本来就来发病的他,还真的病倒了,还要陪我这傻子哈拉, 真难为他了,有点感动............................................

昨天拔牙.....今天去学校去graduation ceremony,还是那么无聊,闷,我还是第一个上台拿证书的form6家伙, 真的是紧张死了>.<......







回到班上,


看到班上的同学替另外两个同学庆生, 还搞supprise之类的, 很羡慕.... 什么时候我像他们人缘那么好啊?什么时候才有人愿意陪我过生日啊? 不晓得.......



我就来生日了,

希望不再是一个人, 在人潮拥挤的购物广场, 一个人听着mp3,走了4个小时, 才心甘情愿吃了一片蛋糕,目送我今年的生日吧?

去年的情景, 却不希望今年依然如此........ 谢谢Andrew 小色狼弟弟 还有 小我3个月3天的帅哥Daniel ,期待你们生日礼物哦~ 我会记们你们的生日的 :D

班上的男生,最后的一次合照

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

29th Octorber


梦居

凌雾玉叶芬绕杨

古亭倚藤小琴郎

筝随流水迷雾中

寂寥伴奏鱼随唱


雨阳

绿衬红冠风依然

冰晶寒露缀星晚

紫霞半掩夜光芒

幽幽暗光透心房


枯叶川水无情风

林聚成亭影孤独

破伞黯然桦木下

身木两具魂已融



哎....

三言两语

带不出千缕哀愁


一夜朦胧

支身小鱼

在旮旯

赏着

断枝珊瑚


Thursday, October 9, 2008

9th October

今天是我娘的生日~~昨天漏夜跑去买个Secret recipe的蛋糕,一家人延迟睡眠,就为了等她夜班回来可以第一时间庆生。。。
看着她渐渐好转的精神,搂着我们俩兄妹的幸福表情。。。 哈哈~~ 感觉还真温暖。。。
本来想放我娘切蛋糕的欢乐表情上来的,但是她说她胖,不要献丑哦.........( =_=ll aunty里面她算苗条咯....)

最近找图片,无意中找到我7年前很迷得一款游戏 。。。。很怀念以前一个人在ps前面过日子的童年。。。哈哈。。。现在长大了。。。却渴望另外一些遥不可及的事情。。哎.......





哎。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。今天又在冰冷的课室内,睡了一个上午。。。颓废阿...

Friday, October 3, 2008

3th October

这几天过的真是折磨死人了...每天去警察局办手续,还要中saman还有写report,还要找sarjan请喝茶,哎....................昏倒............ 还好昨天就弄好了,等着弄insurance然后去修理就可以了..... 我可怜的车子阿...........哭死.........
.




哎....... 都没什么心情了,一家人去看 画皮 ,看到满凄惨的夫妇....如果真地找到这样的另一半,死也真的是无憾阿.......主题曲, 画心-张靓颖 , 很好听......



画 心 ---《画皮》主题曲

作词:陈少琪
作曲:藤原育郎
演唱:张靓颖

看不穿 是你失落的魂魄
猜不透 是你瞳孔的颜色
一阵风 一场梦 爱如生命般莫测
你的心到底被什么蛊惑

你的轮廓在黑夜之中淹没
看桃花开出怎样的结果
看着你抱着我 目光似月色寂寞
就让你在别人怀里快乐

爱着你 像心跳难触摸
画着你 画不出你的骨骼
记着你的脸色 是我等你的执着
你是我一首唱不完的歌

看不穿 是你失落的魂魄
猜不透 是你瞳孔的颜色
一阵风 一场梦 爱是生命的莫测
你的心到底被什么蛊惑

你的轮廓在黑夜之中淹没
看桃花开出怎样的结果
看着你抱着我 目光比月色寂寞
就让你在别人怀里快乐

爱着你 像心跳难触摸
画着你 画不出你的骨骼
记着你的脸色 是我等你的执着
你是我一首唱不完的歌


你的轮廓在黑夜之中淹没
看桃花开出怎样的结果
看着你抱着我 目光比月色寂寞
就让你在别人怀里快乐

爱着你 像心跳难触摸
画着你 画不出你的骨骼
记着你的脸色 是我等你的执着
我的心只愿为你而割舍


听着听着......怎么突然间......................哭了..............

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

29th September

Today i wake up really early in the morning, just to celebrate my friend who is a really nice girl... i wake up early even i slept last day at 3 am, and i reach the Macdonald early than others about 30 minute.... i spend my whole morning to celebrate with her... she is very happy.....
During my tuition class.... i am quite happy so... because i knew what to do for the question given by teacher... but then my friend Yan Zheng send a news that he went into a accident, a lorry bang his Proton Iswara backside. I am worry him too, But lucky he is okie, just the backside lamp was crashed. Okie... he is fine then eveything is okie...
Tonight i have a meal with my old tuition class friend, we chat alot.... and we eat nice food... and we joking a lot so. We go and find our tuition centre headmistress , Miss Siew for visit, she still so beautiful and nice people. She treat us a lot of strawberrys, joke and some special event in her teaching life.... Afterward, i send all my friend back home by my cool Red Issawa.... We chat in my car, i felt so happy, really.
After send Chia Shiun and Liang chai go home, next is Ah Pang, then we go search for shortcut back to su shyan house. But this girl girl always bring me go Holland, we lost but lucky we get back the correct way after 3 minute..... haha...


But the God seem like going to fooling me.....

When i turn into right side road in a juction, there are all dark infront of the upcoming road, i do not see any car lamp light or motor light comeing along the road, think is safe enough, then i quicky turn inside the road without showing signal.when i turn halfway, suddenly an dark OBJECT heading to my left car light.It bang it hardly and bang second time at left back seat door. I am stunned, When this motor come? Why i cant see any light?? i am sure there is no light at all. i quicky park the car beside and go look for that injured. all the malays drop by, they scold me or even pointing me, say me not give signal, and driving so fast. I argued back, is that driver had not on his light, they say he had, Whatever, all those malays people just scold and do nothing there. Su Shyan was panic, she call her daddy, and i call my mom so... then one of the injured malays friend say that he need a phone to call his family, so i borrow him my phone and i call su shyan take care and also my phone, i go take my care and bring this malays guy to clinic. but when i bring that malays into car, i found that my phone gone. Huh? a bad feel get ride in my mine, sure i have lost it.... yea... a indian take it and gone.... Haha....... how silly i am....

for 20 minute the doctor exam the malays, he got injured his brain last time, so now he have bang his head again, but lucky he wear helmet, but he feel a bit not well. Maybe he need to do X-Ray scanning to determine any blood clothing or spine injured or else. but the doctor say he is fine, just his hand got some injuries. Oh..... then he leave and i bring my dad to make report in Klang police station..... Now just need to depend to the motorcylist condition, perhaps he is fine, if not, maybe i will stay in jail or penalty 10k or both.... Haha.........

2 hours at there, write report..... sarjan asking question.... explaining what am i facing..... and take car photo.... my car was heavily damaged.... i really sad and heart thorned.... i like my car very well..... it is my only way to let me go out from house to school, tuition, shooping, meeting with friend.... and also my phone.... i grab many nice picture for Pei Seen, who birthday today... and also the puppy hanging on my phone..... i really love it....

Alone in living room, with my dear computer.... i only can pour out my tear now... little by little, soundless..... i am weak.... i control my feeling in police station, at the clinic, and also....the panic, the helpless feel....and etc.... i dun wan show weak in front of people... i knew i am wrong, so that malays too, but i dun wan cry.....

But.....


My brown jacket, whch is my favorite cool preventer, was saving my tears, drop by drop..... No people can share my feel.... Only crying can let me released from this stress.....


I am a useless boy....

Friday, September 26, 2008

26th September

It has been a long period i have not update my blog. Just kept my memorial in my dairy. A exam week, totally make me fade out. I do not like to study at all, but i have to.... whatever... at lease i done some hard work for this exam, although it does not work at all.....
It was cool today, either in class or in tuition center. Honestly my body absolutely weaker than normal people. I felt into half conscious and sleepy.... cannot stand this.... i walk to my friend class and try to have a new environment. They are much more happier, play around even we all have to sit for last paper in an hour. By completing my dairy, i notice that i start to feel a bit lost, after 3 more month, would i still have chance to joke with them? Wonder...
My tooth start feel some aching and pain.... it make me hard to sleep or think at all... although i go look for dentist for last month and doctor repair for it, but it getting worse.... should i decide to pull off this tooth or just left it? But i will permanently lost one tooth if i take it off, but in reverse i have to spend thousand of dollar to cut off my tooth spine.... headache.....
These day i start to think about friendship, now only i notice that i do not have a good friend( i mean boys, i have one good friend who is a girl) which can share my life. Suzan is busy in study, so..... haven to depend to my dairy, to find a way speak out my thought, silly huh?
The Haze from forest fire was arrived....at the same time,a mist approaching to my life.....

Sunday, August 3, 2008

3th August

Yesterday my old friend call me out. I knew something wrong with him. Exactly, he promote a plan to me. Those plan is quite good, is a kind of chain relation ship with profit and others. It base on networking market and brandy organization. But if i join, i need to pay RM2000 to buy a product, thats product is nice too.... a type of glass, 13 or more minerals atoms lock inside the silica structure . These atoms vibrate, and cause some resonance wave. these wave which can decompose the water molecules and restructure back. It seem so good and its last 15 years, according to his talk.

This biodisc, seem every useful. although it cost 2000 ringgit, but it last 15 years.... is it worth? Maybe, but main point is the organization. They have wonderful time and great motive than i can imagine. They spend time to build up a huge relation, and they search for money together, and they enjoy together. I wall admire, but.....

dose RM2000 can "buy" those happyness and health?? i wonder.....

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

30th July

Today i am absence to school again... i have a bit cough and fever but it does not matter... but my head seem like a bit heavy and even i am conscious , i still feel i am dreaming. Cant differenciate i am in life or in dream actually. But my sister say i am lazy, alright... may be i am.....

Have a nice time with su shyan and my sister today. A nice movie, although is a bit odd actually....


Anyway, i felt happy that somebody accompany me go out and take a walk or gathering. There are less people in Jaya Jusco Cheras Selatan, but i like it, sometime a kind of peach is a luxurious for me. A malay tradition music player, playing a kind of block of bamboo cylinder. the sounds are nice, and awesome so.

Seeking the others 鬼吹灯 episode, a bit disappointed. No new stock yet, but my sister keep dawn herself into her idol magazine. Kidda silly but she seem cute, she beauty too.... no doubt.

Soon be my english presentation, i hate it, all my teammate all seem sloth enough and i am headache how to score a good mark when trial exam. maybe i will give up so... because MUET exam pass already... Haha... i am a bit irresponsible, but i really hate to present my idea in front of my class mate. Why? because they never listen to me....

Perhaps, i can get a nice gift to Huei Zhi, i wonder what should girls likes for gift. A DVD? A Books? A shirt or blouse? or a fluff doll? Confusing.... but i wish i can gift something to her, she is a special girls. In all my friends. ( I should apologize, she is not my type....)

August... coming soon... with this, about 4 people will have their birthday , i am quite pity, my birthday is on November, that time is for final exam, or holidays, or part time jobs golden time. Less and less people will remember thats. Any way, at lease cute su shyan would always get it ^^. Good buddy~

Today the weather is hot and clam, without wind, and influence my mood so......

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

29th July

Finally i finish my all chemistry report, today teacher start to configure our marks, she gonna went for new birth of her baby. I like this chemistry teacher very much, although sometime she a bit mad, but consider she as pregnant women, i still like her attitude. These day she went into class like normal, but with her big stomach, just like a going burst balloon, is kidda funny but i feel a bit admired and respect. She was thin, and short than me even. But anyway she holding a big stomach which would be a weight for her.

She said this is her 1st baby, wow.... nice... i do not know either is girl or boy, because i have no chance and reason to ask so... anyway, i wish i can watch her baby, maybe after our exam. i wonder would the baby handsome or pretty or cute? Imaging....

Back to topic, i have 7 chapter handout gonna complete.... iknew she was a good teacher but i do not wish i get blast from her. Pregnant women cant get ride of mad, is not good for child~~ Haha...

A new life born, with a long time raising. Amazing huh???

My friend, her grandmom pass away so, bless for her grandmom..... i dunno what to do, is amazing when give a life born, in fact, a life would be taken instantly and unexpected.

May be is time to enjoy what should i am having now. ^^

Saturday, July 26, 2008

26th July

4.09pm cloudy

Sometime i really feel disappointed that i cant even master my language. Either in English, Mandarine or Malay... Kidda disappointed. Yesterday, my english teacher check my handout which i going to present afterward. " Odd sentence, what is this? just a worse draft, make me headache... how do i should mark on this?" said teacher. Alright.. honestly my english is poor, not like others, some able to write a marvelous essay, some can speak extremely fluently although on the stage. I am quite admire them... imaging if i was them, i really satisfied.

Today i absent to school again, i do not like to attend school. Stay in class, although there are many joke, topic discussion and study group. But i do not interest, i like mandarine books, i like music, and i like games. They just like study, english literature,and songs. Totally different between us.... what should i do???

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

燃盏点烛鬼吹灯





最近迷上了一个小说,像我这种华语半桶子的,能看上十页都算是神奇中的奇迹了耶。但是最近就是很邪,看了一本鬼吹灯,竟然花了200块卖了一套,搁在家里的百年封尘廉价书柜,正烦恼要怎么慢慢炮制熬煮这些砖头般的植物纤维~~煞是桃子里蹦葫芦,天方夜谭阿。。。。。。。。。有点昏厥。。我怎么那么冲动阿o[O.O]o

虽然书里的文法,语言都跟我的华语了解程度又极度大的落差,但是奇怪的事,怎么我就是明白这些胡言乱语甚至是有点神经病的对话?难不成我生下来就像书里的胡八一,是名盗墓贼??? 倒斗的工夫其实乍看下,我也蛮感兴趣的~~~~呵呵呵呵~~~真有机会我也想去学两手,当然不是盗墓,我反倒想造墓~~因为我对水木工城镇的蛮有憧憬啊~~~呵呵呵呵~~~以其破坏那么维美及精密设计的古墓,倒不如开发出来供人欣赏更实际~~~ 开间博物馆来展览,肯定可以大受欢迎~~~哇哈哈哈哈哈哈~~~~~~(幻想ing)

说倒容易,小说归小说,现实归现实,我还是回去当我的啃书呆包子吧~~(继续我的鬼吹灯II=怒靖湘西~~~刚刚吞完了 黄皮子坟 还有南海归虚,实在着了迷哦~~)
呵呵呵呵~~~满推荐哦~~大家在popular bookshop就可以看到了~~~ 喜欢小说的可以去看看,要跟我借也行!!等我把这些新书给翻旧了再说 :D

Friday, July 18, 2008

MUET

Malaysia University English Test,哇。。。。。看起来好像很难哦, 我去年考第一次也只是拿了一个low band 3.当时还以为这个考试震得很有水准耶,什么时候马来西亚有个那么厉害的教育制度哦?可喜可贺耶~~~

混账, 什么可喜可贺?! 才那么band 3叫我怎么进大学阿,英文文章每天被批严重离题, 不然就是grammer structure and vocabulary immature. 还被英文老师鸟到臭头。。。。 可恶!!! 当时头皮头发头壳头脑都统统被抓伤了。 结果。。。立刻跑去跟负责老师讨了一张resit examination form 来, 打算做最后一次拼命。。。 你问我有信心么?我跟你说, !!完!!全!!没!!有!!

那么我还考来干嘛?那张slip拿来炒鸡蛋么?我也只能说一个非常简单的理由, 为了封住我家里两个长老的嘴, 仅此而已.....

好了, 今年年头又来一次补考,出了考场, 依然像去年的情景一半,嬉皮笑脸走着出来,板着脸回到家。心里都有个谱了, 应该和上次也差不多吧?反正我语文课超级烂,烂到全班应该都没有人比我烂那种程度= _= ll

过了3个月,突然间有朋友走过来,“喂,MUET考得怎样?”, 我愣了, 今天出成绩咩? =_= ll 好像完全忘了这回事耶。。。。但是, 竟然不敢sms去询问成绩了, 怕死新作蒜...等到了全部人差不多知道到了, 自己才偷偷的在桌底下sms,=—=ll 反正我的成绩没有人鸟我,我也不是那种一考就考到band 6 的 gigantic red star feller. 算了啦!!band 3 就band 3,顶多不要去大学罢了, 老子在form 6就好像在大学了拉,还进去干吗??

You have
1 message from 39003

your band achieved, band 4

O.O

虾米???!? 瓦靠!!这样都band 4 O.O,真的天没眼咯!!!瓦卡咔咔~~~(奸笑中~~~)
也许使我高兴得太早,老师说,我们的水准根本没有进步, 只是不知道为什么突然间全部突然间那么高分。其实想一想,也对哦,好像我班上的副班长,本来只是band3 upper,现在竟然band 5 O.O,就连他自己都不信呢。。。另外全部band 3 lower or band 2 upper的, 统统不是band 3 upper就是badn 4 mid.这个解释些什么呢?

MUET 沦落成Matrikulasi的烂臭水准咯...........瞎子都明白阿==

不是我强,只是改考卷的人故意让我强. (PS: 看到名字前面有个Malaysia的test,少考为妙,考得好不是你聪明,不如去考singapura那个test更实际,至少standard不会被spoil掉啊,你说对否?"